Chrissy Teigen is engaged. Also, here’s 93 pictures of her.

Just another day at the office

There goes my dream of marrying Chrissy Teigen. Her long-term boyfriend John Legend asked her over the weekend. You dick! From E!:

John Legend has gotten the green light for marriage. The Grammy-winning
soul singer popped the question to his longtime girlfriend, model
Chrissy Teigen, over the holidays, his publicist confirms to E! News.
Legend’s rep, Cindi Berger, tells us the pair — who’ve been dating
since 2007 — got engaged “while vacationing in the Maldives.” No other
details were disclosed.

“John Legend has gotten the green light for marriage.” What the hell is that supposed to mean? Does anybody reading this really believe that John Legend had to “ask permission” to marry this broad? Permission from whom, I ask? Look, we all have our places in life. Some, like yours truly, are destined to be masters of the information superhighway. Others, like yourselves, must submit to my will. It’s the way things work. John Legend and I, who are peas in a pod, take what we want. We crush our enemies, see them driven before us, and hear the lamentations of their women. We do not ask permission.

December 29, 2011 - 6:30 am