Katie Holmes still feels trapped

Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise at Brooklyn Bridge park in New York (9/3)

Katie Holmes still feels trapped by ex Tom Cruise, even though he’s only like 5’6″. C’mon, Katie, you’re taller than him. You should be the one doing the intimidating. From the National Enquirer:

“Because of Suri, Katie is tied to Tom for life whether she likes it or not,” said an insider. “If I were in her shoes, I’d be looking over my shoulder every step to see Tom’s reaction. I know how she must feel. It would be torture almost 24 hours a day. I don’t see how Katie would ever be able to relax. However she looks at it – she’s trapped.”

“The ongoing communications between Katie and Tom about Suri’s schooling, visitation, her health or his financial obligations are certain to be a constant reminder of the control that Tom will probably always have,” explained a close friend. “There will be a battle over Suri’s affection for the holidays. Katie must be fretting over where Suri should spend Thanksgiving and what she should buy her for Christmas. There’s always the worry that Tom will outdo Katie and make her feel inadequate as a mother.” (Print Edition – 11/26)

I think Katie is over-thinking this situation, big time. Tom seems like a completely sane man . . . for a guy running a religion based on bad 1950’s science fiction. OK, maybe Tom isn’t so sane, but all is not lost. Katie can still have a life without Tommy Christ watching her every move. The solution is really simple: start dating black guys exclusively. No matter how crazy and intrusive Tom may be, I bet he doesn’t want to be labeled a racist. I don’t care how much power the Church of Silly Horseshit has, in today’s world, the worst thing you can be called is racist. Right, Mel?


December 5, 2012 - 6:30 am