Paris Hilton is still a spoiled little bitch

Paris Hilton’s birthday champagne

BREAKING NEWS: Paris Hilton is still a delusional, spoiled little bitch. Tune into the 11 PM  broadcast for the latest on this shocking story. From the Daily Star:

Socialite Paris Hilton transformed her house into a virtual fairytale world as she celebrated her birthday with a star-studded Alice in Wonderland party on Saturday. The hotel heiress, who turned 32 on 17 February, donned an Alice costume and decorated her Los Angeles mansion with themed props, including towering mushrooms and larger-than-life butterflies. She also treated her pals to 100 bottles of Champagne, a feast of sweet treats and multiple birthday cakes, including one topped with a figurine of Hilton surrounded by tiny paparazzi models snapping her picture. Rapper Lil Wayne and DJ Tiesto provided the entertainment by playing sets for guests including screen stars China Chow, Efren Ramirez and Jesse Woodrow, as well as director Eli Roth.

Good Lord in his spaceship, an overly-indulgent dad throwing a birthday party like this for a 16-year-old girl is sorta understandable. But a 32-year-old socialite/faded reality star throwing it for herself is borderline psychotic. This reminds me of the good ol’ days back in college, not when I was writing my thesis on the Theoretical Causes of Immature Personality Disorder, but of the time my asshole roommate spiked my pancakes with acid. I jumped out of a third story window because I thought I was a goddamn dragon, but once the LSD was out of my system I regained a grasp of reality and realized I wasn’t actually peeing fire, whereas Paris, well, you know . . .

Tags: Paris Hilton
March 6, 2013 - 9:15 am