Halle Berry not so good at this marriage thing

Halle Berry and Olivier Martinez divorce

Third time’s not the charm for Halle Berry. After a little over two years of marriage, Halle and her baguette-loving husband, French actor Olivier Martinez, are divorcing. Halle previously divorced David Justice in 1997 and Eric Benet in 2005. To put that in perspective, Kim Kardashian has had less divorces. Wow. In a statement, the couple said:

“We move forward with love and respect for one another and the shared focus of what is best for our son. We wish each other nothing but happiness in life and we hope that you respect our and, most importantly, our children’s privacy as we go through this difficult period.”

A source adds to E!:

“Olivier has spent a lot of time in France and working overseas. They have had long stretches of time apart and both seem happier when they don’t have to deal with the other. They have a lot of differences culturally and as far as lifestyle goes. Things didn’t jive between them and they grew apart. It was a challenge to meet each others’ needs and be on the same team. They’ve essentially been separated for several months, but now they are both ready for a clean break and to move on with their lives.”

This whole long-winded explanation can be summed up in three words: bitch is crazy. By all accounts, Halle Berry is goddamn crazy. You fuck crazy. You don’t marry it. Wow, I should put that on my next line of greeting cards. Also, I should start a greeting card company.


October 28, 2015 - 4:15 pm