+ Shia LaBeouf might have to get his pinky amputated [Just Jared]

+ Lindsay Lohan and her lesbian boots [Drunken Stepfather]
+ Christina Augilera Nude. As In Completely Naked [Egotastic!]
+ Holly Weber is your afternoon pick-me-up [F-Listed]
+ Morgan Freeman say’s he’s “doing very well” [ICYDK]

+ Miranda Kerr looking devilishly hot [Popoholic]
+ Joanna Krupa topless in Maxim [Horny Oyster]
+ Beyonce finally wearing her wedding ring [Bossip]
+ Eva Longoria looks pretty damn pregnant [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]

[BauerGriffinOnline]

So you know Ranae Shrider, the chick who fucked Mini-Me? Turns out she has a lawyer and he loves picking on midgets. And implying that they have STDs. Via TMZ:

Ranae Shrider’s legal mouthpiece, Keith Davidson, is raggin’ on Verne claiming he can’t pay his taxes “because he is paying his lawyer hundreds of thousands of dollars to file ridiculous lawsuits.” He cites, among other things, the suit against TMZ for running the sex tape story, which was dismissed.

Davidson calls Verne “a small-minded, vindictive, heartbroken, desperate and trivial celebrity,” adding, “Mr. Troyer would be better served retiring his Federal and state tax obligations rather than suing a girl who he dated for only three months before videotaping their diminutive sessions.”

Shrider’s lawyer ends with the following shot: “Ms. Shrider would still like to thank Mr. Troyer for the ‘lasting’ gifts he has imparted her with.” (Source)

How low can a scumbag lawyer go? Apparently 2 feet 8 inches. And to say that Verne is “small minded” is hardly a ground breaking revelation — the guy has a head the size of a Cabbage Patch Kid. Let’s just hope that the “lasting gift” the little guy left Ranae isn’t an unwanted pregnancy. Because the last thing Verne needs right now is to show up at a Planned Parenthood facility and be confused with one of their “clients”.

Wow, Lily Allen went nearly four hours today without letting her boob fall out of her shirt again. That’s gotta be some sort of record for her.

[BauerGriffinOnline]

The Bachelorette, DeAnna Pappas, and her fiance, Jesse Csincsak, washing their car in Hollywood (8/6)

[Pacific Coast News]

Congratulations to Celebslam reader Bill F. of Topeka, Kansas, who correctly guessed that little Maddie Briann’s first trip to Wal-Mart would occur exactly 49 days after her birth. Enjoy your new microwave Bill.

[Pacific Coast News]

Actually, I don’t even think that counts as a wardrobe malfunction. It looks like she’s pulling her shirt down on purpose. Bitch doesn’t even care. Any more boob showing and we’d be legally required to play a Poison song and start slipping dollar bills down her shirt. I guess the point I’m trying to make here is, Lily Allen will you marry me?

[BauerGriffinOnline, Splash News]

Don’t click the picture. Just trust me dude, don’t click the picture.

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