Paris Hilton likes monkeys more than penises
During a recent interview with Australian Cosmopolitan, Paris Hilton revealed that her newest bedtime companion is not a guy but a baby monkey named Brigitte Bardot. Paris is no stranger to exotic pets having also owned a kinkajou, which are illegal in the state of California. Additionally, Paris is again claiming that she’s not as big a slut as everyone thinks:
“I don’t do that [have sex] unless I’m in a relationship. I’m old-fashioned when it comes to that. I really am!” Hilton told Australian Cosmopolitan. “Yes, I’ve kissed a lot of guys. I like to kiss, but that’s it. I don’t go home with anyone. I sleep with my animals, like my baby monkey, Brigitte Bardot.”
When asked to describe herself, Paris said:
“I’m blonde and tanned and normal-sized! I’m sweet, shy, funny, have a big heart and I’m nice - and I like to eat.”
What the fuck? Paris is asked to describe herself and the best thing that she can come up with is that she’s “normal sized” and also “likes to eat.” My dog thinks that’s stupid and he’s not against eating his own shit. On the bright side, I suddenly have a new appreciation for graffiti alongside the freeway. It’s like Shakespeare compared to the drivel that comes out of Paris’ mouth.
